Cheaper, Modern (Valley of the) Dolls
I checked to see how much sunshine was true
I feel so blessed one-stop is there for me
Based on/the latest rage in glamour drugs
We made the switch, did not return the fight
For heaven’s sake I don’t know who last week
Perverted the intention of the sun
There are no plans; these things have saved our lives
With our deeper cuts, our lack of love,
we are kind of regulated
SHOWING MY WORK
I checked/ to see / how much/ sunshine /was true
I feel/ so blessed/ one-stop/ is there /for me
Based on/ the la/test rage/ in gla/mour drugs
We made/ the switch,/ did not /return /the fight
For hea/ven’s sake/ I don’t/ know who/last week
Perver/ted* the /inten/ti(on) of /the sun
There are /no plans;/ these things/ have saved /our lives
With our /deeper/ cuts/ our lack/ of love,
we are /kind of /regu/lated
Taylor, Sarah. Special to Ottawa Sun. “Keeping the faith. The Ottawa Sun, E-Dition. A2.
Blizzard, Christina. “Something definitely stinks. Ib id. A3.
Helmer, Aedan. “Old Drug, New Tricks.” Ibid. A4.
__. “E-cigarettes can save lives.” Ibid. A4.
Archambault, Jesse. “Time to vote but…” Ibid. A6.
__, “Trade shows span the spectrum.” Ibid. A12
Yuen, Jenny. QMI Agency. “LCBO Express-Sing Disappointment” A7.
PROMPT: BLANK VERSE AMIDST THE PROSE
Compose a poem using unintentional lines of iambic pentameter found in your newspaper. (from the Oulipost Playbook & the Found Poetry Review).
Yesterday I had to shop in a fucking Walmart.
This one was fairly straight-forward. No tool was going to be able to help but the ear. I cheated in the following ways: a) I changed possessive adjectives from third person plural to first person plural, believing that somewhere in the Ottawa Sun are first person adjectives; a) I broke the iambic pentameter in a couple of places. In line six because I liked the phrase too much to fuck with it & in the the penultimate line, because it sounded right. In the case of the last line, I was being deliberately perverse. Note that Sundays I’m going to be using the Sun because the Citizen has no Sunday newspaper.